Ramblings...This person you’re seeing now?She doesn’t exist. Her bouncy steps and cheerful smile, her contagious laugh and her kindness…It’s all an act, a default setting really. No matter how much you know about her, you’ll never know me. I won’t let you see through my mask.You will be deceived like everyone else.You won’t be able to save me, no matter how hard you try. Because, the truth is, I just want to fall. But on the inside, part of me is screaming…I do exist.I used to be like that.Please, see through me.Try to save me, even if I fall, I will see your hand reaching for me.And it will give me hope as I plummet.
One Day..I love his smile, So warm and kind.And when he laughs,It just blows my mind.I never knew anyone could be that carefree,I never thought anyone like that could take an interest in me.When I’m around him, everything disappears.Whenever he hugs me, it crushes my fears.But there is one fear that never goes away.It’s the fear that he’ll see my scars one day.
He Makes Me SmileI met a boy the other night,He makes me smile and treats me right.He compliments me on my laugh,He’s sweet and funny and good at math.I met you in a club and it was “love at first sight",You took me home and I was yours for the night.You told me I was stupid and undeserving of you,But I stayed around, tolerating every bruise.He asked me out to dinner last week, I said no, but kissed his cheek.He tells me I’m beautiful and makes me smile,He tells me his stories and lingers a while.You use me whenever you want a “quick boost”,But honestly, prick, I’m sick of this abuse.Do you know why I haven’t cheated on you?It’s because I’m afraid of what you’ll do. But you know what, babe?Screw you and your temper.Today I escape,And leave you forever.
My RemedyMy gashes have faded to pink and silver lines. They’re easier to hide than the deep red cuts that used to cover my body. I failed every rehab program that tried to fix me and let the addiction take control, slowly coming to believe that nothing would ever change. I would always be trapped in the hellish existence of numbness. But one day, he stumbled into my life, quite literally, and with him, my grey world shifted into color. His smile lit up everything inside me and rushed blood to my cheeks. I found myself looking forward to the feeling of seeing him. My friend, the razor, was soon forgotten and his face filled every empty part of me with joy and excitement. We were only friends for a very long time, but after a while I noticed that he was calling me beautiful and little things here and there. No matter what happens now, I know that I can handle it. Even if he leaves me, I have gotten a taste of true happiness and I will not let it go.
FoundI found my razor blade again,Its sweet relief against my skin.My tears flow out through the blood on my wrist,Soon I'll be gone and I won't be missed.Hush-a-bye hated it will all be over soon.They’ll find you asleep beneath the full moon.
I will...I will hold your hand through the good and the bad,I will wipe every tear from your eyes when you’re sad.Though you’ll tear me apart,I will give you my heart.I will love you with everything I’ve got,Even if you just use me and then leave me to rot.
Tear Me OpenTear open my wrists,Cut out my heart,Beat me with fists,I won't fall apart.I've been broken and fixed,Too many times.I'm tired of sympathy,Just let me lie.When you ask how I amAnd I say I'm okay,Though you know it's a lie,Just leave it that way.When you see that I'm tired And can't go on,Just keep pushing me,It will make me strong.I need to be strong,I need to be brave.I need to move on,I need to escape.So tear open my wristsCut out my heart.Do your worst.I can't fall apart.
AdventureOnce upon a time, there lived a little boy. This boy had the perfect house, the perfect mother, and the perfect father. Everything was perfect. Except for him.He was always sick and confined to his bed. There was nothing to do and no one to talk to, until one day, a little girl showed up. Her clothes were quite tattered and her hair was a mess, but her sweet little smile made her beautiful. The two of them talked for hours on end, but she’d always disappear when someone came in. At first, the little boy thought nothing was too strange about it, but then he began to notice the blood stains on her dress, the bruises on her face, and the dirt that puddled around her feet wherever she walked. His mother found the soil strewn all over the floor and could never fathom how her bedridden child created such a mess in his tidy, bare room. The little boy seemed happier lately. He was almost able to walk and his cheeks had a light coloring to them now.“Get out of be
ReachHelp, I’m drowning in a sea of confusion.Lately I’ve been reaching out,But all I grasp is the illusion.Can someone help me shine a light?I don’t know what I’m thinking tonight..I want to care, but I just can’t.I want to breathe but I just drown.
Angel TearsImagine a raindrop is an angel's tearFalling from heaven on Gaia's mortal fearWeeping in unity their children's lost soulHeaven's pure spirit evil now doth controlEden of rapture consumed by time's flowA lost utopia where gluttony doth grow.Alluring serpent's lair humans covet the baitDevourer of truth so poisoned with hateInnocence now lost in maelstrom of desirePurity long blackened by greed's hungry fireThe spirit debased evil darkens the heartThe nefarious abductor tears the soul apartThe moment approaches the farmer shall reapLove now eternal for faithful lost sheepGnashing of teeth those left in despairTime now elapsed for repentance and prayerRenounce the darkness and take gentle heedEmbrace the truth be the Lamb's seed
Confusion 4 - A GerIta Story I love dreaming of Doit-su, he is always nicer in my dreams. He eats my pasta and smiles more and helps me find really cute girls. Nothing like him when he wakes up though, he is all serious and "WAKE UP NOW ITALY". I don't understand why he has to always wake up so early, not everything needs to be done at eight in the morning. Plus, why does he have to wake me up? Why can't he do whatever by himself and not bother me? I would like him a lot more if he let me sleep once and a while. I love Germany but, not when he is being stupid."Go away," I mumbled, shoving my face deeper into the pillow I was squeezing, "I am tired.""Stop being lazy and get out of my bed.""But, I'm comfy," I whine, turning my head to Germany and pouting, "I don't want to move!""I do not care what you want," he rolled his eyes, pushing me with his foot off of the bed, "Get off my bed and get up.""NO!" I yell, stubbornly gripping the head board as the rest of my bo
APH 9-11 Fanfiction- Part 5APH 9/11 Fanfiction- Part 5 Japan, England and Canada stared at America as his eyes slowly came into focus. When they did, America stared back at them. No one moved, for they were all holding their breath. America's eyes settled on his brother. "Canada?" His voice was barely more than a whisper, and was extremely hoarse. Suddenly, the whole room sprang into action. It was as if America's voice stirred them from a frozen trance. Canada started crying again, Japan ran to get a nurse, and England rushed back to America's side. "I'm right here, America" Canada sobbed. America tried to nod his head but the pain that it cause was almost overwhelming. America gasped. "Don't move, you git." England said gently to the younger nation. America turned his head ever so slightly to look up at England. The look in his eyes said it all. America forgave England for everything that had
Do You Remember?Do you remember that poem you wrote me?Well, I found it the other day.It was in my jacket pocket.I didn't know one piece of paperCould bring back so many memories.It's amazing how long it has beenSince you gave it to me.I am thankful thatI had you in my life.All the good and bad times,They made us that much stronger.Thank you for coming into my life.Thank you loving me.I couldn't have asked for anything better.So you see what a simplePiece of paper with words on it can do.It made me remember why I cared so much.It made me remember you,So thank you for writing it.By: Veronica Allen
I Am That GirlI'm the girl who writes poemsBecause it helps me get my feelings out.It's the only way I know how.I'm the girl who will love anyoneNo matter who they are.I'm the girl, who can be annoying at times,But I love life and everything in it.I'm the girl who will always makeRoom in her heart for someone,Because I love just about everyone.I'm the girl, who will flirt with you,But never admit to you how I really feel.I'm the girl who will truly love you.No one will ever love you as much as I do.By: Veronica Allen
StrengthAfter everything that she has been through,She finally feels her strongest.She feels like nothing can bring her down,And for the first time she’s happy about who she is.She no longer thinks that she is useless.When she looks in the mirrorShe sees someone who is prettyRather than ugly.It took her awhile to get where she is now,But she is forever grateful for the obstacles in her lifeThat made her strong.Her new found strengthMakes her feel like she can do anythingAnd she can be anything that she wants.She is finally the girl that she wanted to be,But finding that girl took a little whileAnd took a lot of pain and heart ache along the way.But she did it.She survived the pain and heart ache.She rose above when everyone expected her to fall.Those that have brought her downHave made her that much stronger.She has lost someone that she has loved.She was dying on the inside,While on the outside everyone saw her fake smile.But now everything has changed.Now she
We Lost Each OtherI regret the day that I lost you.I should have tried harder,I should have made more effort,But you should have too.We both loved each other,But I guess not trying resulted in usLosing the person we loved the most.I've never loved someone so muchUntil the day I met you.Maybe if we had tried harderWe would still be together.But at the same timeIf we have stayed togetherThen we wouldn’t have met other people.We wouldn’t have gotten the chanceTo fall in love with someone else.We wouldn’t have gotten the chance to let goAnd learned to start overEven though we lost each other,We gain so much knowledge from it all.We found out who we really were,And what we want out of our lives.So maybe losing each other was eitherThe best thing or the worst thing,But neither of us will know how the other still feelsBecause we lost each other.By: Veronica Allen
I'm Not That Girl AnymoreYou know that girl you use to love,Well she grew up.She's different now,And has a lot more going for her.She's more confident in herself,She believes in herself,She had to overcome so muchTo be who she is now.That broken fragile girl is stronger now,She's able to smile,And mean it.She is able to be happyWhen she wasn't before.She was lonely on the inside,And she didn't know who she could be.That girl that grew up,And changed has become a better person.She's always smiling,She's always happy,So don't you worry about her nowBecause she is just fine.I'm not that girl you use to love,I grew up and changed forever.I'm not as fragile as I use to beBecause I have grown stronger.I'm no longer that broken girlBecause I have a purpose in this life,And I have found who I was supposed to beBecause I'm not that girl anymore.By: Veronica Allen
Night Time Has ArrivedThe sun has set,And the night has arrived.It's a different world out there.It's scary, dangerous, and dark.It makes me so alive.I fit right in with the animals of the night,And they graciously accepted me.Night time has arrived.The darkness has set in,The stars and the moonShine so brightly.The cool crisp airAwakens my senses.It's almost like we have become one.I fit so perfectly in this darkness.I never want to leave this place.The crickets, and the strange noises,Make me feel at easeBecause I know that night time has arrived.By: Veronica Allen
I'm ScaredI'm scared to love someone.I'm scared of what might happen.I don't want to let someone in,Because I don't know what might happen.I'm afraid, and I shouldn't be.I shouldn't be afraid of somethingLike this, but I am.I know what love is,I have seen it,And I have felt it,But I'm still scared.Maybe I'm scaredBecause of what happened last time.It didn't work out,And it didn't turn out that great.I was miserable,Because I didn't knowWhat I was supposed to do.I didn't know how to love someone,Maybe because I didn't knowHow to love myself.By: Veronica Allen
She Always Had LoveShe has made mistakes in the past,But considering everything in her life hasn’t always been great.She isn't evil, heartless, or selfish,She’s so shy and closed off because of everything in her life.All her life she's felt like a disappointment,She’s always felt second best; she's been deprived of love,She spent years completely alone.So don’t blame her for being who she is.Some people aren’t meant to be saints or angels.Some people have darkness in them,And most people have a past that they are not proud of.They are equally as good, bad, selfish and selfless as each other.However when it came to him, she always made the right choices for him.She always did what was best for him because she loved him,She didn’t pretend to use him,Or mess with his head.What she felt for him was real?She always saw the good that was in him.She loves him as much as he loves her.She admits that she does wrong,And that she’s not perfect.But all s
What Happened to Her?What happened to her?What happened to the girl she used to be?She became someone different.She let go of the old herAnd she became someone else.She became the girl, who wore make-up,She became the girl, who wanted to be pretty all the time,She became the girl, who cared about how she looked,And cared about what others thought of her.But most of all she became the girl she said she would never be.Maybe she has changed for the better,And maybe she didn’t.Let’s just hope she knows what she getting herself into.Since she has started to changeShe has felt so much better.She feels like she belongs,And she finally feels whole.I often wonder what happened to her.I wonder if she still lingers inside of herWaiting for the day that she can come back,But the truth is, she doesn’t want to be her again.She doesn’t want to be that broken person that she was,Maybe someday she’ll look back at the old her,And realize how much she has changedAnd also
They Give Me HopeYou see those stars in the sky,Well they give me hope.Every twinkle, every bright light,Well it captures my heart.Every time I see them,I know they're all I have left.I know that they'll stay the sameWhen everything else changes.It seems kind of funnyThat I'm talking aboutA big ball of gas in the sky,But those stars up there,Well they know my secrets,They know my wishes,They know my fears and desires.Although I cannot touch them,And they cannot answer back.I know they'll be waiting.They'll be there when I go to my window.They'll be there to hear meWhen no one else will.So you see those stars in the sky,Well they give me hope.When I feel like giving up,They give me strengthWhen I don't feel like getting up.By: Veronica Allen
I Got LostSomehow I got lost.I feel like I am backTo where I was before.Before I fit in so well,Now it feels likeI’m back to being an outsider.Somehow I forgot who I could be.Somewhere along the wayI lost the spirit that I once had.I need to fit in again.I need to get her back,But I’m scared I might lose her again.Somehow I lost myselfI was told to keep the spirit alive,But somehow it disappeared.Somehow I became the girlThat I once hated.I don’t know if I will get the spirit back,But I have to try somehowBecause I made a promiseWhen I left that placeThat I wouldn’t become that girl again.So for the sake of myself,And for the sake of others,I will get her back.I will be the girl that I once knew.By: Veronica Allen
I'll Give This A TryMaybe I should give this a try.Maybe it will turn out betterThis time around.Just promise meThat you won’t make me have second thoughts.Promise me I won’t fall out of love.I can’t afford another heart break.Even if you get me,Don’t forget to keep doingWhat you did to get me in the first place.If I give this a try,I hope we can last.I haven’t been very goodAt showing my feelings,But I’ll give it a try.I’m hoping we can make this work.I’m hoping it turns out betterThis time aroundBecause I don’t knowIf I’ll survive another heart break.By: Veronica Allen
RevengeHurt them, Burn them,Make them pay.Hunt them,Bind them,Can’t get away.Harm them,Break them,They will pay.Remember what they did,Think of what you’ll do,You need to avenge yourself,Because no one will remember you.